You're Welcome Here

"And I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the LORD." Hosea 2:20 has been a key verse to me for so long. To know the Lord more truly everyday...that is the desire of my heart: to be near to Him, to "learn of Him," to experience all that He is. He is so good. But instead of looking at that last half about knowing Him, let’s look at that first half about betrothal. First of all, God frequently calls His relationship with His people a marriage. This is what makes the "knowing" part all that more close and intimate in meaning. This may sound weird to some of you - especially to those who don't yet know Him - but consider that marriage is supposed to be the closest human love relationship we have and you might understand a little better.
Anyway, back to my main point. He didn't just say "I will betroth you to Me." No, He said, "I will betroth you to Me in FAITHFULNESS." Did you know that God says, "I hate divorce" (Malachi 2:16)? And can we blame Him? Look at what havoc it has done to the people He made and loves, what pain it has caused. But there's more.
Something Mike, lead singer of Tenth Avenue North, said at a concert once really stuck with me. He was talking about how God hates divorce and he said that God hates it because it makes Him look bad. How? Because it makes us think that He'll leave us...Think about this for a minute.
I have never been divorced (lol or married) and my parents are goin' on 34 years of marriage, never divorced. Yet I have been left, abandoned by friends and others at different times and in different ways. I have discovered recently just how much that has colored the way I view my God. When we've been abandoned by others before, we believe we'll be abandoned again. And yet He says, "I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness." Faithfulness means a never-failing commitment.
"I will never divorce you," "I will never leave you nor forsake you," "I am with you always," "I have loved you with an everlasting love," "I will never abandon you"....
Do I believe Him? Or will I continue to view Him through a lens created by sinful humanity and thus continue to run and hide my most vulnerable self?...Do I believe His love? Do I believe it?? This is a constant fight.
You know, I used to hate my weakness and by that I mean the part of me that seems so small and scared and frail and soft and vulnerable and lonely. And if I'm honest, I still sometimes despise it and shove it away telling myself that I have to be stronger. But back in July, in Colorado, I tried to shove that away again, but God took that weakness by the hand, that little girl, and brought her back into my sight. That which I have despised, He said, He has loved...He has loved...How mind-blowing, earth-shattering that what the world says isn't good enough, what world looks on with disdain the God of the universe loves and looks on with compassion. To what the world says, "Buck up and be better," God says, "You're welcome here."
He has taken me back through my past, through moments of pain, when others hurt me, abandoned me, ignored me, or just didn't seem to see me at all. And you know what He said? "I loved you then. When others didn't notice you, I saw you, and I loved you when they didn't. I loved that little girl." And He has to do this over and over again - tell me He loves me in the wounded places and "speak on her heart."
Do I believe that He, above all others, will not abandon me when I bring to Him the weakest, frailest, smallest, most vulnerable, and most fearful things in me? Do I believe that He won't just leave me out in the cold when I show to Him the raw and broken parts? Sometimes. My friends, do you believe that for yourselves? How I pray that you do. How I pray that you believe that you can "Pour out you heart before Him...for God is a refuge for us" (Psalm 62).
One last story: At the same Tenth Ave. concert that I already mentioned, they played the song "By Your Side." First of all, the song is just amazing and I love it. But what made it such a highlight was that fact that Mike was crying during the song...crying singing "'Cause I/ I love you/ I want you/ to know/ That I/ I love you/ I'll never let you go." I looked at him and just thought, wow, this is the heart of Jesus toward me...this is His heart. I talked to Mike later and he said that he had never before gotten emotional during that song, but that it was like God made him feel what He feels for His people and said, this is My heart for them. Nothing could have been more apparent.
It's a love like this, a heart full of such tender compassion, that beckons us to Him, calls us out of hiding, and gives us the freedom to be weak. ‘Cause when we let Him into our weakness, He won’t abandon us there.

"O my dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the secret place of the steep pathway, let me see your form, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet and your form is lovely." - Song of Solomon 2:14

"Can't you see
I won't leave
You have to open your eyes
Here I stand
Take My hand
Let go of the fear that you hold"
-"She Cries" by East West

"You could've bowed out gracefully
But you didn't
...
Sometimes the place I go
Is so deep and dark and desperate
I don't know, I don't know
How everyday
Everyday, everyday
You save my life"
- “Everyday” by Rascal Flatts



“By Your Side” by Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving
these days?
Why are you trying
to earn grace?
Why are you crying?
Let me lift up your face
Just don’t turn away

Why are you looking
for love?
Why are you still searching
as if I’m not enough?
To where will you go, child?
Tell me where will you run?
To where will you run?

‘Cause I’ll be by your side
Where ever you fall
in the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands
and My side
They swallowed the grave
on that night
When I drank the world’s sin
so I could carry you in
and give you life
I want to give you life

And I’ll be by your side
Where ever you fall
in the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at My side
Where ever you fall
in the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Cause I,
I love you
I want you
To know
That I
I love you
I’ll never let you go
No

And I’ll be by your side
Where ever you fall
in the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at My side
Where ever you fall
in the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you